Wine around the world

when i sat down to watch television the other night, francis chan was not on tbn so i did a little channel-surfing. 

on the travel channel, i encountered andrew zimmern (”bizarre foods”) and adam richman (”man vs. food”) together on the same program.  if you are not familiar, both of these gentlemen are renowned for their willingness to eat anything.  both, however, have their specific specialties: zimmern is known for trying (and enjoying) peculiar foods and richman is known for eating vast quantities of almost anything.  on the program i happened upon, zimmern was introducing richman to the joys of lutefisk.  the only reason i know anything about lutefisk is that i am a fan of garrison keillor’s writings.  in fact, i will let keillor describe lutefisk for you (from his book, “pontoon”): 

“Lutefisk is cod that has been dried in a lye solution. It looks like the desiccated cadavers of squirrels run over by trucks, but after it is soaked and reconstituted and the lye is washed out and it’s cooked, it looks more fish-related, though with lutefisk, the window of success is small. It can be tasty, but the statistics aren’t on your side. It is the hereditary delicacy of Swedes and Norwegians who serve it around the holidays, in memory of their ancestors, who ate it because they were poor. Most lutefisk is not edible by normal people. It is reminiscent of the afterbirth of a dog or the world’s largest chunk of phlegm.”

on the aforementioned tv show, zimmern coerced richman into taking a tentative taste.  after the compulsory comments and facial expressions, andrew zimmern made one of the most ridiculous comments ever uttered: “it’s an acquired taste.”

we’ve all heard it, but have you thought of how absurd that is?  you are basically saying, “i put something disgusting and repulsive in my mouth over and over until i finally became impervious to the revulsion it caused initially.”  why on earth would someone do that?

i thought about this while i was mowing yesterday (what else are you going to think about while doing yardwork?  i tried to think about god but my mind kept drifting to this subject).  i was reminded of a recent debate on “out of ur” about alcohol (if you like, you can check it out here and here).  the purpose of this post is not to discuss my views on alcohol (although we could do that one day), but to apply the convoluted logic of “it’s an acquired taste.” 

look…i know why people drink.  to get a buzz.  to relax.  to take the edge off.  so, then, what is the point of a glass of wine with dinner?  some people apparently love wine, but honestly, didn’t it taste better when it was just grape juice (before it “soured”)?  i have friends (some pagans and some liberated believers) who tell me they just love the taste of beer.  i’m not buying it.  i can’t get past the smell, much less “enjoy” the taste.  one of my best friends tried to introduce me to the joys of single malt scotch.  last time we were together, he poured me half-an-inch in a tumbler (about $19 worth) and urged me to sip it slowly.  to me, it tastes like a hospital smells.  i felt like i was tasting insect repellent.  i cannot do it. 

if you’re telling me i need to keep trying (and try again) until i get past the revulsion stage to where i can tolerate it and maybe one day drink it without scrunching up my face (and not to gut drunk, mind you, but just to have a drink), then i have one question:  why?

i’d sooner try lutefisk.  you see, it’s an acquired taste.